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Why me Lord, Why?

For the eyes of the LORD range throughout the earth to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to him.

2 Chronicles 16:9a

Have you ever been so burdened by life’s hardships that you’ve wondered, “Why me?”  Have you ever gone through such a painful experience it’s left you feeling orphaned and alone?  Have you encountered such deep loss you’re wondering how you are going to make it, or what the purpose of the suffering might be because it seems so useless?  Well you’re not alone.

The Bible is filled with characters who reached varied levels of desperation during the course of their spiritual journeys.  Consider Moses, who returned from meeting with God at the top of the mountain only to find that he had lost his congregation to the worship of the golden idols (Exodus 32).  What about Elijah who was so depressed and desperate when Jezebel came after him that he told God he wanted to die (1 Kings 19).  Think about Job and all the losses he suffered, not to mention the friends who burdened him with faulty theology in the midst of his suffering, and the wife who urged him to commit suicide (Job 2:9).  Or imagine how the psalmist must have been feeling when he lamented about his situation (Psalm 22).  Now think about Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane (Luke 22:42).  You are definitely not alone in this.

I came across a true story of a young woman named Brenda who received an invitation to go mountain climbing with friends.  Even though she was deathly afraid, she took up the challenge, put on her gear and went climbing.  Half way up the face of the mountain, her safety rope snapped knocking her contact lens out of her eye.  There she hung suspended midway with several hundred feet of mountain above her and several hundred below her.  Brenda looked for her lens on the ledge of the rock where she had stopped for a breather but could not find it.  She was desperate and upset as she continued her blurry ascent to the top of the mountain. Along the way she prayed that God would help her find the lens.  She hoped it was stuck to her clothes. 

When Brenda arrived at the top of the mountain, a friend looked all over her clothes but there was no lens to be found.  Tired and upset, Brenda looked out across the wide range of mountains thinking of the Bible verse that says, “For the eyes of the LORD range throughout the earth to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to him.”  Brenda thought to herself, “Lord, you can see across all these mountains.  You know where every stone, every leaf, and every piece of sand is placed.  You know where my contact lens is.  Please help me.”

As Brenda’s party descended down the trail, they came across another party of climbers.  As they passed each other, someone from the other party shouted, “Hey!  Did any of you lose a contact lens?”  As startling as that question was, what happened to the lens was more startling.  The climber reported that he had seen an ant slowly moving across the face of the rock carrying the lens.

Later, upon hearing this incredible story, Brenda’s father, a cartoonist drew a picture of an ant carrying a contact lens with the caption under the picture that read, “Lord, I don’t know why you want me to carry this thing.  I can’t eat it and it’s awfully heavy.  But if this is what you want me to do, I will carry it for you.”

Perhaps you are feeling like that ant today.  God may be asking you to do something right now that feels like a heavy load.  It may feel like it is weighing you down.  You may not be able to see any good in it.  Carry it any way and trust that God who sees all and knows all is up to something good.

Loving Father, I cast my cares upon you.  Remind me each day that your thoughts are not my thoughts, neither are your ways my ways.  Give me grace to carry this load with a spirit of obedience and with the kind of faith that reminds me, you are up to something good.  Amen!